Um... yeah. I don't really think now's such a good time to do this one.
I've always been a little wary of the stock market. The only gambling I really like are nickel slots in Reno, because I once won like two hundred bucks after putting in about $12. (And I spent it all on bathroom fish, a scary ballerina painting, booze, and pancakes.) Nickels are a currency of which I am not frightened; I've been known to have some rolling around the bottom of my black hole of a purse. Hundreds or thousands of dollars, however, I do not have rolling around in my purse or in my bank account. Or in the stock market. I have a paltry 401K, but we've been assured that it will be okay. Um... yeah. We shall see.
The only "active" experience I've ever had with the stock market was in eighth grade, when we did a unit on stocks in our social science class. We all had to choose a stock that sounded interesting, and I, being a forward thinker, chose ATARI.
I was SUPER into Atari for a while. (In fact, I still have my Atari game and cartridges, and I keep meaning to hook it up. How "old skool" and ironic of me!) I would spend hours playing Atari in our basement -- Pitfall, Kaboom!, Pac-Man, Frogger, Space Invaders, but totally not Combat, the game it came with -- while listening to The Tubes "Completion Backwards Principle." (Every time I hear the song, "Talk To You Later" which, I'll admit, is not often, I think of totally kicking ass on, like, the highest level of Kaboom!. DORK.)
Kaboom was, like, totally bitchin'!
So since I was familiar with the Atari product and figured that everyone in the universe would want this magnificent system, I used it for my project. (Along with probably every other kid in the class who didn't ask for their parents' stockbroker's advice. There were kids like that in my school. Who were probably rich last week.) And I don't remember exactly what happened, except I checked the paper every morning, recorded the numbers in my notebook, and I think would have made about eleven dollars by the time the unit ended if I had actually invested.
Hey, that's a lot better than some people did today.
And here's the song that's been going around and around in my head since this morning.
Something's Gone Wrong Again -- The Buzzcocks
(Sort of -- as close as I'm gonna get anyway) fifteen down, 82 to go.